Too funny...

Was looking at some random stuff online and found this. I had to put it down here! It's brilliant!!

This is a little story about a conversation between a PC user (the Customer) and Technical Support...

• Customer: "About time too. Are you a real person?"
• Tech Support: "Yes sir, how can I help you?"
• Customer: "I moved some stuff I don't use to the trash and deleted the trash, and now I'm getting all sorts of %&*#ing errors. What are you going to do about it? You've got an accent, haven't you?"
• Tech Support: "Yes sir, I'm in Ireland."

It became apparent that the customer, in his wisdom, had destroyed the Windows registry and deleted just about everything he needed to run Windows.

• Tech Support: "Sir, I believe we will have to reload your system with its original operating system, as you are presently unable to get into your system due to the necessary files being deleted. Unfortunately you will lose anything added since you purchased the system. Shall I walk you through the reload sir?"
• Customer: "You mean I paid $2,000 dollars, and I have to reload this myself?" (rants for fifteen minutes, makes death threats and references to being supported by a third world country) *&@$ing reload! I'll give you a reload!

Bang! Bang!

• Tech Support: "Sir, is everything all right?"
• Customer: "Sure is. I just blew the $#%&ing thing to bits with my shotgun you *$@%ing &*%$er."
• Tech Support: (taking a satisfying long breath) "Sir, I would like to advise you at this point that gunshot damage is not covered under the terms and conditions of your warranty. May I suggest a servicer in your locality to assist in the reassembly of your machine?"
• Customer: "$%!# you."

I dissolved into fits of laughter.

Browsing to destruction...

Came into work this morning to discover that my password had been changed. Logged in, loaded up my e-mails to receive one from one of my colleagues, saying that I'd had a mass outbreak of spyware appear on my PC.

It's all been cleared out now, but they've got me going back through a proxy server again. The amount that restricts my access to the internet is unbelievable.

Now obviously I'm no idiot; I'm not going to look at any dodgy stuff online whilst at work, so that leaves me with the question; where the hell did I pick up that spyware?!

The sites I'd look at at work; G-mail, TfL, maybe the MET office, that's about it...

Is the internet really that unsafe for us to look at?

The amount of security we have on our networks is unbelievable; Cisco PIXs, Firewalls with built in malware protection, Fireboxes, and still they get through?!

It's a scary world we live in now...

(at least for computers...)

Where have I been?

Long time, ten dollar, sucky-sucky!

Well it's been a long time since I've posted on here, and quite a lot has happened...

I'm now in a fantastic relationship with Kaz, one of the girls I had the three-way relationship with and it's going brilliantly. I feel really close to her now - far, far, far closer than I had during the three-way (although not very surprising when you think about it!)

Also started a new job last month; I have finally left the ranks of Snopake Ltd and now working for RW Communications Ltd as a 1st line support engineer! (woo!)

My room is now almost 100% finished; got my nice new double bed, got my flat-screen HDTV, and I've got my 360 Elite. Life is good! Just trying to save as much money as possible for Christmas, also hoping to go to Center Parcs some point just after the new year. There's also been talks about a paintballing trip, if anyone's interested?

The Brothers Potts had a free house for a few weeks. I left my 360 with them for two weeks. I think they nearly came to death over it... Still, can't blame them, it really does kick arse! Halo3, Assassin's Creed, Skate, it's all just so good!

Also started to learn how to play Backgammon. Had a board at my house for years and years but never actually understood the rules. Had Jon Potts and Mike Martini explain the rules whilst I watched them play and now I'm hooked! Been having some excellent games of Othello (AKA Reversi) with Jon as well on our random late-night meet-ups.

Gonna be going to see Kaz in London tonight, hopefully she'll be showing me where the mead shop is, then we'll go to the Trocadero, chill out there for a bit, grab some food then make our ways home!

Really need to try and start getting my driving lessons done; work have offered me a £2k payrise once I've done it. Plus it would also be nice for when Kaz and I want to go and do stuff, for example going to Center Parcs, Avebury, wherever! Even driving across London to see her!

Today's going pretty slow so far... Only taken 17 calls and it's already 11:10am. I dare say it will get busier in the afternoon, but who knows?

Anyway, back to the fun of the phones.

Have fun, all!

The Pan

Finding the right words...

How can you tell a person that you love them when you're afraid of the way they'll react?

Is it cowardly to just keep quiet, to try and keep things on the status quo?

Do you risk more by not saying it than saying it?

When you have that fear, is that the point when you should just turn around and say no?

Why is every line of this post a question?!

Pan

Nice Guys Come Last...

It's true, sadly...

I've just come out of what was a fantastic relationship, just to have it turn really messy at the end. Take it from me; three-way relationships are fun, but they take a HELL of a lot of work.

Communication is by far the most important thing. If you're not emotionally mature enough to be able to hear what other people have to say about yourself and not immediately react severely, then you're on the right path.

One thing I've noticed about humans is that they say things to each other and they're completely misunderstood by their peers. Whether this be choice of words, body language that's been incorporated or even just the tone of your voice, it can make such a drastic change. To be able to not accept things for face value is something that I've been working on for several years now, and it has helped me to understand other people, see how they live their lives and how their universe works.

If someone says something hurtful to you, acknowledge the emotional response that it triggered, then step back, look at what was said from their point of view, try to understand it from their perspective. Then discuss with them what they meant, develop on the subject, and there you go, there's one massive emotional outburst avoided and the talking that had taken place should have bought you closer together.

BIOS Beep Codes - Detect your Bios errors

I was reading up about BIOS beep codes and discovered this... Hopefully some of you may find it useful at some point...

Pan

---

"When a computer is first turned on, or rebooted, its BIOS performs a power-on self test (POST) to test the system's hardware, checking to make sure that all of the system's hardware components are working properly. Under normal circumstances, the POST will display an error message; however, if the BIOS detects an error before it can access the video card, or if there is a problem with the video card, it will produce a series of beeps, and the pattern of the beeps indicates what kind of problem the BIOS has detected."

Here a few Beep codes are listed. Mainly for AMD motherboards, but also applicable to Intel systems too.


AMI Beep Codes

1 beep - DRAM refresh failure. There is a problem in the system memory or the motherboard.

2 beeps Memory parity error. The parity circuit is not working properly.

3 beeps - Base 64K RAM failure. There is a problem with the first 64K of system memory.

4 beeps - System timer not operational. There is problem with the timer(s) that control functions on the motherboard.

5 beeps - Processor failure. The system CPU has failed.

6 beeps - Gate A20/keyboard controller failure. The keyboard IC controller has failed, preventing gate A20 from switching the processor to protect mode.

7 beeps - Virtual mode exception error.

8 beeps - Video memory error. The BIOS cannot write to the frame buffer memory on the video card.

9 beeps - ROM checksum error. The BIOS ROM chip on the motherboard is likely faulty.

10 beeps - CMOS checksum error. Something on the motherboard is causing an error when trying to interact with the CMOS.

11 beeps - Bad cache memory. An error in the level 2 cache memory.

1 long beep, 2 short - Failure in the video system.

1 long beep, 3 short - A failure has been detected in memory above 64K.

1 long beep, 8 short - Display test failure.

Continuous beeping - A problem with the memory or video



Phoenix Beep Codes

Phoenix uses sequences of beeps to indicate problems. The "-" between each number below indicates a pause between each beep sequence. For example, 1-2-3 indicates one beep, followed by a pause and two beeps, followed by a pause and three beeps. Phoenix version before 4.x use 3-beep codes, while Phoenix versions starting with 4.x use 4-beep codes.


4-Beep Codes :

1-1-1-3 Faulty CPU/motherboard. Verify real mode.

1-1-2-1 Faulty CPU/motherboard.

1-1-2-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

1-1-3-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components. Initialize chipset registers with initial POST values.

1-1-3-2 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

1-1-3-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components. Initialize CPU registers.

1-1-3-2 Failure in the first 64K of memory.
1-1-3-3 Failure in the first 64K of memory.
1-1-3-4 Failure in the first 64K of memory.

1-1-4-1 Level 2 cache error.

1-1-4-3 I/O port error.

1-2-1-1 Power management error.

1-2-1-2 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
1-2-1-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

1-2-2-1 Keyboard controller failure.

1-2-2-3 BIOS ROM error.

1-2-3-1 System timer error.

1-2-3-3 DMA error.

1-2-4-1 IRQ controller error.

1-3-1-1 DRAM refresh error.

1-3-1-3 A20 gate failure.

1-3-2-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

1-3-3-1 Extended memory error.

1-3-3-3 Error in first 1MB of system memory.
1-3-4-1 Error in first 1MB of system memory.
1-3-4-3 Error in first 1MB of system memory.

1-4-1-3 CPU error.
1-4-2-4 CPU error.

1-4-3-1 BIOS ROM shadow error.
2-1-4-1 BIOS ROM shadow error.

1-4-3-2 Level 2 cache error.
1-4-3-3 Level 2 cache error.

1-4-4-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
1-4-4-2 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
2-1-1-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

2-1-1-3 IRQ failure.
2-1-2-1 IRQ failure.

2-1-2-3 BIOS ROM error.

2-1-2-4 I/O port failure.
2-1-3-2 I/O port failure.

2-1-3-1 Video system failure.
2-1-3-3 Video system failure.

2-1-1-3 IRQ failure.
2-1-2-1 IRQ failure.

2-1-2-3 BIOS ROM error.

2-1-2-4 I/O port failure.

2-1-4-3 Video card failure.
2-2-1-1 Video card failure.

2-2-1-3 Keyboard controller failure.
2-2-2-1 Keyboard controller failure.
2-2-2-3 Keyboard controller failure.

2-2-3-1 IRQ error.

2-2-4-1 Error in first 1MB of system memory.

2-3-1-1 Extended memory failure.
2-3-3-3 Extended memory failure.

2-3-2-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

2-3-2-3 Level 2 cache error.
2-3-3-1 Level 2 cache error.

2-3-4-1 Motherboard or video card failure.
2-3-4-3 Motherboard or video card failure.

2-3-4-1 Motherboard or video card failure.
2-3-4-3 Motherboard or video card failure.
2-4-1-1 Motherboard or video card failure.

2-4-1-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

2-4-2-1 RTC error.

2-4-2-3 Keyboard controller error.

2-4-4-1 IRQ error.

3-1-1-1 I/O port error.
3-1-1-3 I/O port error.
3-1-2-1 I/O port error.
3-1-2-3 I/O port error.

3-1-3-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-1-3-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

3-1-4-1 Floppy drive or hard drive failure.
3-2-1-1 Floppy drive or hard drive failure.
3-2-1-2 Floppy drive or hard drive failure.

3-2-1-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

3-2-2-1 Keyboard controller error.

3-2-2-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-2-3-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-2-4-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

3-2-4-3 IRQ error.

3-3-1-1 RTC error.

3-3-1-3 Key lock error.

3-3-3-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.


3-3-4-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-3-4-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-4-1-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-4-1-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-4-2-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-4-2-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-4-3-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-4-4-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
3-4-4-4 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

4-1-1-1 Floppy drive or hard drive failure.

4-2-1-1 IRQ failure.
4-2-1-3 IRQ failure.
4-2-2-1 IRQ failure.

4-2-2-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
4-2-3-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
4-2-3-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
4-2-4-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

4-2-4-3 Keyboard controller error.

4-3-1-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
4-3-1-4 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
4-3-2-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
4-3-2-2 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
4-3-3-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
4-3-4-1 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.
4-3-4-3 Faulty motherboard or one of its components.

4-3-3-2 IRQ failure.
4-3-3-4 IRQ failure.

4-3-3-3 Floppy drive or hard drive failure.
4-3-4-2 Floppy drive or hard drive failure.


3-Beep Codes

1-1-2 Faulty CPU/motherboard.

1-1-3 Faulty motherboard/CMOS read-write failure.

1-1-4 Faulty BIOS/BIOS ROM checksum error.

1-2-1 System timer not operational. There is a problem with the timer(s) that control functions on the motherboard.

1-2-2 Faulty motherboard/DMA failure.
1-2-3 Faulty motherboard/DMA failure.

1-3-1 Memory refresh failure.

1-3-2 Failure in the first 64K of memory.
1-3-3 Failure in the first 64K of memory.
1-3-4 Failure in the first 64K of memory.

1-4-1 Address line failure.

1-4-2 Parity RAM failure.

1-4-3 Timer failure.

1-4-4 NMI port failure.

2-_-_ Any combination of beeps after 2 indicates a failure in the first 64K of memory.

3-1-1 Master DMA failure.

3-1-2 Slave DMA failure.

3-1-3 Interrupt controller failure.
3-1-4 Interrupt controller failure.

3-2-4 Keyboard controller failure.

3-3-1 CMOS error.
3-3-2 CMOS error.

3-3-4 Video card failure.

3-4-1 Video card failure.

4-2-1 Timer failure.
4-2-2 CMOS shutdown failure.

4-2-3 Gate A20 failure.

4-2-4 Unexpected interrupt in protected mode.

4-3-1 RAM test failure.

4-3-3 Timer failure.

4-3-4 Time of day clock failure.

4-4-1 Serial port failure.

4-4-2 Parallel port failure.

4-4-3 Math coprocessor.